As there is a saying, kids grow up and learn by seeing their surroundings. Like others, I also grew up by seeing my parents and uncles. We were lower middle class joint family, where sole bread was earned by my father and uncles. In mid-90’s Bangalore was not a silicon city and most of the people had to travel North India for job. My dad also left to Mumbai (city in North India) to earn bread.
So, most of my childhood was with my mother, grandfather, grandmother and uncle. This is a true story, which took place 15 years back. This is a story of my uncle, who used to stay with us under the same roof.
My grandmother has 4 children. She gave education to all the four of her kids. Three of her kids studied Bachelor of Engineers (B.E) and one of her son did Bachelor of Science (B Sc). During 80’s and mid 90’s, B.E is considered to be the highest degree after Medical. Basically, ours is a “Family of Engineers“.
My uncle who did B.Sc, did not get a qualified job which he required. He had some job and was not happy with it. He was getting frustrated about the job. When he felt it was not worthy, he chucked his job.
He tried his best by applying jobs, but none was fruitful. My grandparents including relatives, started pressuring and underestimating. Since, he could not take this, he used to leave the house early morning and returned home for lunch. Completing his lunch, he used to leave the house again and returned in evening. None, knows where he used to go but never had any bad habits, for which I had to appreciate.
As the years passed, he was still unemployed and was the time to get married. By seeing this, my grandparents supported my uncle and set up a shop, which had Xerox and typewriting (Xerox was just introduced and new to the market). But his luck, none came forward to give girl for him. If someone came, one of the close relative used to say negative about him and proposal used to get cancel. Further, shop also dint run that great.
By listening to everyone, he started underestimating himself. He underestimated so much, unknowingly he went under depression, started getting angry and also stopped travelling outside. He always used to stand outside our house, smiling unnecessarily and started self-talk as well. Still he had conscience, he was not totally lost. In addition to that, at that time medical was not so much advanced to provide medicine for depression. So Ayurveda medicine was given, which did not help him much.
As a kid, I was afraid to go near him. People around me used to give negative reactions and talking unreasonably about him. Me as a kid, I was listening to people. Whenever I used to sit in front of the TV after studies, my uncle used to come and give me a hug and pat with all the love. Also, when I came back from school, he was giving chocolates all the time. Bu, I never ate them.
From my childhood till today, I am a person who dreams a lot and did not study well. During my childhood days, surrounded people used to compare me to my uncle and used to say, if you don’t study well or don’t go to school or don’t write your homework, you will be like him. He was set as an example for all the negative things.
Whenever I remember him, I always think, he should not have listened to people. If he did, should not have underestimated himself. Sadly, we lost him few years back due to heart attack.
Today, I write this blog just for you. From your life, U made me learn, NOT to LISTEN to NEGATIVE PEOPLE and NEVER UNDERESTIMATE YOURSELF.
Dear uncle, never got an opportunity to tell you that, I still miss those chocolates and pat on my shoulders.